Regret

Matthew 6:19-21
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Heaven is this earth in the future, when God returns and redeems this earth bringing it back to the way things were at the garden of Eden before the fall of humanity (not some place up in the clouds where we play harps, or even just a big worship service).  The idea of "being too heavenly focused to be any earthly good" is an idea that doesn't understand heaven and hasn't looked at the lives of history's most heavenly focused people.  If life in heaven is basically life in a redeemed earth, then many of the things we enjoy here and now we can enjoy there.  We don't need to waste our time getting as much pleasure today as we can.  There will be time for that in eternity.  Instead, seeing heaven ahead of us, we spend our time here doing the things we can't do in heaven; we rescue the world from sin, hopelessness, and brokenness.  Spending our time amassing wealth does us no good.  We leave it all behind.  Redeemed lives though come into the new heaven and new earth with us.  The stories of people who had clean water to drink because of our obedience to God will come to heaven with us.

In light of that, as our lives come towards their ends and we transition into eternity, will we regret the time wasted now on the eternally insignificant? (which things count as eternally significant would be another entire series of blog posts which I won't discuss right now).  This clip from the end of Schindler's List portrays the regret of a man who did so much but could have done more.  I don't know if he is right in reacting the way he does or not.  He seems to ignore the joy he could have from saving hundreds of people, to focus on the 12 he lost, but actually that sounds a lot like the good shepherd leaving his 99 sheep, to search out the one who was lost.

I don't believe God's goal is for us to live our lives in misery, but I also can't imagine him being thrilled when we let the lives of others slip by as insignificant in comparison to the pleasures we want to have fulfilled now.  I want to be able to justify spending money on me for things I like, but I'm struggling to put together any real argument that doesn't sound contrived, and just like an excuse to let me do what I want to do...  I could have sponsored a child for a month with the $19 I spent at lunch today.  There was value to my lunch with friends, but does it outweigh the alternative use of the money?  I am struggling to beat this question.

God Called Me To...

Calling is a crazy thing.  The American Christian perspective, mixed with the perspective of this generation has been the birthing ground of a belief that I find intriguing, but which many people question.  Calling, God's plan for your life, your destiny, predestination, are all words that relate to the topic, and about which people have varying opinions on.  When people claim that God has a particular plan for your life there are two reactions people commonly have.  People are either excited about how God is going to use them to change the world, or people are scared that they will miss God's calling for their life.  This applies in all sorts of areas, but I will stick to how calling affects your career in this entry.

Many people in my generation have watched their parents work long hours for decades at jobs they don't like to make a little more money to make ends meet (sometimes for needs and sometimes for wants).  It doesn't really matter what the money was needed for, I think my generation is terrified of devoting so much time to something they do not love.  It's not worth it!  When you add in what we were taught growing up ("you can be anything you set your heart to be!"), we end up in a position where we want to love our jobs, and if we do not, we have failed.  That goes for the whole generation.  Christians take the same thing and spin it up a bit.  God is calling you to a job that you are passionate about, good at, and makes this world look more like he wanted it to be.

From there, some people decide to just pick their job based on those 3 criteria, assuming that if it meets those, that must be where God is calling them.  For these people, you learn to understand God and yourself, and then you figure out what to do based on that knowledge.  Of course you also pray that God guides you, and then whenever you find something fitting, you can claim that's where God wants you to be.  You've found your calling.  For this person, perhaps there are hundreds of different opportunities that are equally good from God's perspective.  Just take the one you like and it'll be fine.

Another perspective is that you ask God where to go, and he tells you rather bluntly and specifically, probably after weeks, months, or years of prayer and fasting.  Maybe it's something you like and excel at, and maybe it's not.  If you hear God and follow it, you are in his will, but if you miss it, you're in sin, devoting your life to things God never intended you to do.

By my word choice, you can probably guess that I think these views are extreme and over simplified, and that my perspective is somewhere in the middle.  I do believe God made us a certain way with certain gifts and abilities and we are to use them for him.  Think of the parable of the talents.  On the other hand, I do think God calls us sometimes to do things we do not want to do, and do not have the ability to do or do well.  Think of every martyr ever, and also king Saul.  I also think God speaks to us clearly today.  He did in the Bible, and I do not think that's changed.

Imagine you have the option of 10 career paths, I believe you have the potential to honor or dishonor God with every single one of them.  I also think though, that some of them have better opportunity for impacting the world for God's kingdom.  Impact is hard for us to measure, but I think God can measure it.  He probably has a metric like "number of people interacted with" times "number of people saved" times "percent personal spiritual growth" divided by "the ultimate good".  I believe he also somehow knows the future.  Not sure if he knows potential futures, or only the actual future, or how that works, but I am certain, he is better qualified to decide which of those 10 career paths is best for us to take than we are.  So what does that mean to me?

Ask him!

"God, what should I do?  I would like to do this or that, but I don't know the implications of making that choice."

From there, I think God responds in any number of ways, but most often his method of response is such that it is sufficient for us to make the choice with relative confidence that we are doing what God thinks is best.  If God wants me to be a coal miner, and that makes no sense to me, he's going to have to slam some other doors in my face.  I'd need rejection letters from every other job I applied to, and a friend to come up to me out of no where and suggest I apply at the coal mine his uncle owns.  On the other hand, if God is calling me to something I would like to do, and I'm already familiar with his voice, a gentle whisper may be all I need.

All this said, if I hear God wrong?  I do not believe that is a sin.  If he wants me to make shoes, but I make bikes instead, I might miss a great opportunity I would have had, but there will be other opportunities in bikes.  God is not spiteful to his children.  If we miss what he's saying, it will not be the end of the world.  We do not have to panic.  We just need to continue to seek God and take our next steps based on what he is saying at the time.

Oh and guess what?!  Sometimes, I believe there are multiple good options.  You ask God what to do and he doesn't get back to you on which one is better.  Sometimes God just says, "those are both terrific opportunities.  Pick whichever you prefer!"

Anyways, much of this has to do with how clearly you believe God speaks today.  If your God is relatively silent, you are forced towards the first picture I painted.  If you believe God does speak to you, it would seem strange to me, that he would ignore the topic of career as a rule.

I'm in the thick of all this right now.  I have experienced a lot in the last months.  I'll save the personal story for when the story has a conclusion (hopefully in the next few weeks!).  I'll just leave it for now and say, I'm fairly confident where God wants me to be, and I love that feeling.

It Takes A Long Time

It takes a long time to kill a man

55 years at least

until he breaks down 

starts to look underground

and go off and get him some peace.”

I want to die a lot quicker than that

if it’s my only way out.

I’ve been counting up the cost

getting up on that cross

I want to know what this is all about.

A friend of mine, Peter, talked to me about this song during my sophomore year of college.  It’s Jon Foreman (Switchfoot) “Resurrect me.”  He’s talking about the mid-life crisis.  I personally don’t have a lot of experience with these sorts of crises but I’m trying to have mine sooner rather than later.  My perspective is that we have the dreams, goals, ideas, things we live for, that we spend a lot of our resources chasing after.  Maybe we get there and maybe we don’t.  We spend more time chasing though than developing the goals well in the first place.  Then after a while of chasing, we start to wonder why we were chasing what we were chasing in the first place.  A new set of priorities moves in and replaces the old set.

I have definitely had those goals and been chasing them quite systematically.  My senior project, my major, my university, learning Germany, studying abroad were all steps leading up to my goal of developing athletic shoes.  As an intern now at PUMA, I find my goal drawing rather close.  As college draws to a close, I will have some big decisions to make.  I could take a job at PUMA and reach my goal.  I mean, who doesn’t like achieving goals?  Or I could re-evaluate my goal.  Even now I am beginning to step back again and look again at where I am going.  I don’t want to get 20 years down the road working at PUMA and then notice that there are more important things I could have and should have been doing.

I realize this is pretty vague, but that gives you an overview anyway of what’s in my head.  I’m not at all sure where the thought process will lead yet but you can expect to hear more about it over the coming year.

A Moment of Excitement

So this was really cool.  I don’t have any other good adjectives right now so be content with that and let’s move into the crux of the issue.

After 3 full weeks I had begun to wonder about the technology involved in shoes that PUMA makes.  When you read footwear catalogues, particularly in soccer, a pastime I frequented much in my high school days, there are always these little blurbs next to each shoe, “made with power frame technology for more powerful shots!” etc. etc.  So after being here a bit I began wondering who is responsible for those tidbits of selling power.  I’ve seen most of the process and haven’t seen a whole lot of science.  It’s just kinda whateva looks right.  That actually works too.  Why?  because adidas and Nike research and make shoes and so we know what a good shoe looks like, so why actually research?  Well, to be ahead.  PUMA has always, in recent history, been ahead in style but behind in technology.  I hadn’t really noticed that before, but now looking back, I suppose I new it all along and as it became more apparent I decided to just enjoy the aesthetic design side of things, which has been going well I must say.  But anyways, that’s not the direction this story is going.  Let me introduce you to another intern who got here two months before me.  Mechanical engineer from Canada.  Let’s call her Kate for privacy’s sake.  Kate went through basically the same thing I did, except not having much design interest, and loving biomechanics, hunted down the two people that do technology, and said, “I want to make a shoe that is biomechanically advanced!”  They thought to themselves shortly, discussed with some important people and decided it wasn’t a bad idea after all!

While all that went down I was taking finals, going to weddings, packing, and all manor of things that needed to be done.  Now that I’m here and poking my head around I ran into this project, still in it’s infancy, and after getting a few more go-aheads from my department, will hopefully be involved in developing some really awesome stuff.  It’s kinda hard to explain without being too specific but here is why this is so cool.

For quite some time I’ve wanted to be the guy who was the link between the design and the engineering.  I arrive at PUMA, and it turns out that that is exactly what they are in desperate need of.  The technology and design people don’t really know anything about each other or how to integrate their work together into masterful shoes.  The work I expect to begin doing would basically include bridging that gap myself, along with Kate.  Now I’m hoping that the work we do, which is starting as just a sort of side project because we asked, would turn into something so valuable to the company that they decide to make this gap bridger thing a full time gig, and of course that they are so enthralled in my work that they beg me to take the spot.  This would be so terrific, and so awesome, that I suddenly find myself terrified.  I know that if this doesn’t happen that there are certainly other good alternatives, but I don’t know what they are right now so they might as well not exist as far as my excitement and terror are concerned.  This seems like a once in a lifetime chance to make something awesome happen that could have such a lasting impact on the next 50 odd years, and it’s suddenly upon me.  Time to make the most of it.  I don’t want to look back and regret how I blew a marvelous chance.  So here goes, say a prayer for me.  I’m diving in.

Hope that makes sense.

Yes.

That's all for now.

I need to think more about how this affects my life and what my priorities are, but what you just read is the immediate flood of thoughts responding to the issue.  More on this throughout the year.

Joy at PUMA

There has always been something that has struck me as brilliant about PUMA. In a
market dominated by adidas and Nike, PUMA has stayed alive. They do it by staying
ahead. The company was revived in the 90s when they invented the concept of “sports
lifestyle.” The idea of everyday clothing for athletes was PUMAʼs idea and followed
shortly after by giants adidas and Nike. adidas and Nike combine for 60% of the sports
market in comparison to PUMAʼs 6%. PUMA has to be different and ahead to stay
alive. So whatʼs the idea now? Joy.


Joy is one of my favorite things and itʼs a good feeling to work for a company in full
support of it. Sure sports are hard and involve blood, sweat, and tears, but to dwell on
that? Thatʼs just masochistic, we donʼt do sports for the
pain. Sure pain comes along some time and is necessary sometimes, but we do it for
the joy. The feeling of the win, the feeling of speed, the love of competition, the benefits
of a healthy lifestyle, the love of the game, thatʼs what itʼs about! That carries over
outside of sports too as a “sports lifestyle.” Enjoy every moment, love what you do,
laugh!


Take it how you will but we can all use joy in our lives. There are temporary joys
(PUMAʼs focus) and full long-term joy (that comes from Christ). I think healthy doses of
both are... healthy!


At the welcome day we had recently PUMA showed us some really awesome videos
driving this home, but unfortunately I canʼt post them to the internet, but I may show you
some time on my computer =)


Another area where PUMA is leading the way is sustainability. Hereʼs a video about
one of PUMAʼs newer innovations. I present to you, “The Clever Little Bag”:

Radical. again.

Here's another 2 days of sun. I may have lost my camera and spent the sunset searching for it in the second one and missed the sun itself, but it's summer so the sun always comes back. This afternoon I got to spend time with a friend from YWAM (Youth With A Mission). I was reminded of what is so terrific about this group of people that have been a part of my life off and on for many years now. The excitement to take risks for God, and the complete willingness to step, even when terrified of where you'll land, marks these people. They have exactly the same education, background, fears, dreams as I do, only they are willing to step anywhere. It was just another reminder of what God has for us. I'm not allowed to just live a normal American life. That is not actually even a legitimate option. There is nothing that is too crazy to do. I could make a list of options:

- Provide clean water to the whole country of Liberia.

- Make homes for thousands of families.

- Lead the top 12 CEO's in the world to christ.

- Get PUMA to follow the example of TOMS and give away a shoe for every shoe sold.

- Lead an entire University to the Lord.

- Remove poverty from a major city.

- Invest a million dollars in missions.

It's not a matter of, "Am I qualified to do any of that? Which is small enough for me to do?" It's instead, "God, which of these should I do? If you don't tell me than I'll just do all of them!" Because God likes us, each of us is completely capable of doing something that will literally change the world.

Dream

Pray

Walk

Radical.

"A wealthier man in our church family came to my office after we had been studying the story of the rich young man. He sat down, looked at me, and said point-blank, 'I think you're crazy for saying some of the things you are saying.' Then he paused, and I wasn't sure what direction this conversation was going to go. He continued, 'But I think you're right. And so now I think I'm crazy for thinking some of the things I'm thinking.'

For the next few minuets, he described how he was selling his large house and had decided to give away many of his other possessions. He talked about the needs he wanted to invest his resources in for the glory of Christ. Then he looked at me through tears in his eyes and said, 'I wonder at some points if I'm being irresponsible of unwise. But then I realize there is never going to come a day when I stand before God and he looks at me and says, 'I wish you would have kept more for yourself.' I'm confident that God will take care of me.'"

- David Platt in Radical p. 123

"So what is the difference between someone who willfully indulges in sexual pleasures while ignoring the Bible on moral purity, and someone who willfully indulges in the selfish pursuit of more and more material possessions while ignoring the Bible on caring for the poor? The difference is that one involves a social taboo in the church and the other involves the social norm in the church."

- David Platt in Radical p. 111

Above are two quotes from a book called Radical, which talks all about taking back faith from the American dream, that my dad is going through with his small group. I read the finances chapter. There are a handful of puzzle pieces related to where my life is going that are all starting to come together. This is a start.